President Throws Down “Last-Ditch” Gauntlet

Okay . . . most of us are in our 50’s.  I know that in the last 3 years I have actually felt my age and perhaps a couple more.  Tigger remains timeless, showing virtually no sign of accumulating birthdays.  Skipper doesn’t have a joint on his body that is pain free.  Gimli . . . well he has a Harley and a goatee to match . . . looks pretty good too.  Does anyone know if Gringo has entered his fifth decade?  I do know that the Argentinian training program is terminal for most of us especially seeing its effect on the one who developed it.

There are some younger ones . . . yes.  The kids and the kids, aside from Ruperts commitment aversion, seem fairly good with the last reduction in the President’s Challenge.  And maybe in reality, this is simply a dose of 50 + years of reality hitting hard.  I don’t know.


I am prepared to throw down one last effort at making the PC palatable to all of you old farts.  The young bucks can do this with ease and perhaps inspire the rest of us to reach a bit farther as well.

  • Whereas these and other circumstances constitute the current reality of an aging runner’s club;
  • Whereas there seems to be a general lack of grass roots response to the 1st and 2nd readings of the President’s Challenge;
  • Whereas the cost of the Gulf Coast clean up will likely impact our gas prices adversely . . . at some point;
  • Whereas the early morning noise of socks being pulled up over hairy legs, is a sleep deterrent to at least one of the wives of the 6AM’ers;
  • Whereas, coming to coffee dressed up like you ran, actually constitutes a run equal to half of what you would have run . . . if you had actually run;
  • Whereas coming late and leaving early, although unverifiable, also constitutes a 1 count in the monthly totals;
  • Whereas coming to St. Timothy’s, in and around the time that runners would converge on our early morning edifice, is important for the health and longevity of the group;
  • Whereas the motto of the group has recently changed from, “6AM Runners . . . not to fast . . . not to slow . . . half fast.” . . . to . . . “6AM Runners . . . running is optional and coffee is mandatory.”;
  • Whereas, the President, in life transition and exodus from pastoral ministry, has a little more time to waste on this kind of stupid stuff;

Be it therefore resolved once more that the President’s Challenge be further reduced to 12 times* a month.

Now if any of you continue to struggle with this, let’s just pretend that it is going to work for  you.  Pick up the oven mitt that I have thrown down and in the spirit of all that is feminine, rise to this “not-real-challenging” challenge.

I love you . . .

May God bless us every one . . .

President Warthog

*12 times a month is the reasonable suggestion of Johnnie O


10 Responses to President Throws Down “Last-Ditch” Gauntlet

  1. Brian says:

    I’m in

  2. Tigger says:

    I am in. And those runners that are not up to the 12X standard will need to increase over the standard until they have cleared any back log of missed runs. They will be required to report their running log to the president on a weekly basis

  3. Amen . . . by the way, there were hearts on the oven mitt. Thought it might have some appeal to Dave Clark. He was asking about you yesterday Layton.

  4. Gimli says:

    I’m in ???…….what are we doing???
    Is anyone running on Monday??

  5. Pumba says:

    I’ll be there.

  6. skipper says:

    interesting comments from he who hardly runs. 12 times per month..i am in, but Pat do you even know where we start running from…and it is not from your couch…Gimli who is that…sherwood that is a forest in england, i know his wife is studying, but not a 530 am….maybe he can join Yogi in his yoga that is a work out Pat and others can handle, lying on a mat listening to Lionel Richie working up a sweat over a nightmare. I can run monday at the base tuesday wed thursday and back running Friday anyone for a workout ….oh that involves sweating

  7. Brian says:

    I would like to run Mon but I will be going in to work early several days this week. Will be trying to make up for lost time next week, When I’m on Vacation.

  8. Rupert says:

    Skip, I appreciate the gesture in wanting to change my nickname to Yogi, but I am unworthy of that title. I would like to see how you fare making it through a BodyFlow class. If a sweat is induced by nightmares while sleeping, that is as much a workout as any other form of cardio. Hector, we have 2 weeks left. Are you truly following the Argentinian training program?

  9. Pat says:

    Karl…. will you be tracking our results. Can i bank a few before we start in July? Mark me down for 1.

  10. Ronald Stevens says:

    I’m in, What is it again? lol, old farts? bout us young darts? lol, see you’s in the morning!

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